retiredmartin

“Half a dozen…”reaches Essex, that most consistent of counties,

though not one where “must visits” spring as easily to mind as Durham. But here’s five to start you off.

Brentwood – Victoria (last visited in 2017)

The Gray & Son signage is almost a guarantee of near greatness. I did Proper Pub bingo here;

“1. Starting with the mobility scooter at the entrance, 2. Operated by a small local pub chain who know how to run a boozer (Gray & Sons), 3. Selling beers you’ve heard of.

and an old bloke with scarf reading the paper under a Guinness sign.” etc etc etc.

Colchester – The Playhouse (last visited 2019)

You can’t miss out the historic town, home to Roman remains and Ghurkha restaurants and fights outside kebab shops on Friday night. I wanted to pick the Abbey Arms because it looks great,

but it’s changed hands recently, and I’d hate you to be disappointed.

So try the Spoons,

a stunning theatre conversion which I know Quinno rated highly.

Mundon (Maldon) – White Horse (last visited in 2022)

A favourite of the Southworths, Maldon is one of the great unsung coastal towns,

but my tip is just on the edge of town, the White Horse your unspoilt village pub,

“Essex does the “pubs that look like they did in 1982” thing better than anywhere except the Isle of Man, and they also do flat beer on gravity better than most (see also : the multi award winning Swan in Little Totham).“

Chelmsford – Queen’s Head (last visited in 2020)

Since I’ve included a refined diner here (next up) I feel obliged to include an authentic wet-led sweary pub in the great little area west of the cricket ground.

This is what BRAPA thought;

“It had the ‘holy trinity’ of c**p pubness. A surly barmaid (Dad reckoned she smiled for a millisecond on arrival, I didn’t even witness that!), she was miserable to the point I felt a bit uncomfortable as we waited for the drinks to be served. It was freezing cold – I know it is hard to heat some of the bigger older pubs but no effort was made here. Oh, and thirdly, the beer was rank.”

He loved it !

I think.

Actually, you might prefer the Orange Tree next door.

Leigh-on-Sea – The Peterboat (last visited in 2020)

A controversial choice to finish, but you really need to visit Southend on your Essex trip,

if only for the baby octopus and the views across to the Isle of Grain (best in black and white).

The Peterboat looks Dickensian on the descent,

and although its job is to feed visitors from Rochford and Rayleigh it does that very well.

So what’s No. 6 ? Little Totham ? Stow Maries ? Grays ? (not that one).

You decide. Or ask this guy;

I remember that day well.