“PROPER PUB” BINGO IN BRENTWOOD

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I really shouldn’t take the mick out of the beleagured Mrs RM on this blog, especially now her response site is in production.

And she’s been great company on my trips to some fairly basic pubs of late.

Brentwood ought to have some upmarket craft bar by now, you feel, but the High Street looks as chain dominated as it did in the ’90s, losing out to Billericay on the quirky stakes.

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WhatPub shows an old Litten Tree (Doom Bar), an old Hogshead (Greene King), an old local (IPA and Doom Bar), and a Wetherspoons.  Craft invasion well and truly averted there.

And that (newish) Spoons is, perhaps, the ugliest Spoons outside Liscard

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Ugly Spoons

But the town does at least have one glory;

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Brentwood Cathedral

Our new Guide entry is tucked away on the road to Ongar and the Secret Nuclear Bunker, which will make a great micro pub when we’re clear we don’t actually need it.

It may not be straight into my Top 100, but I reckoned the Victoria Arms scored Full House on the Proper Pub Bingo.

1. Starting with the mobility scooter at the entrance.

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The classic road king

2. Operated by a small local pub chain who know how to run a boozer (Gray & Sons)

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3. Selling beers you’ve heard of.

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4. Including Harvey’s Best (cool, dry, NBSS 4) in that classy glass. (see Tandleman today)

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5. An old bloke with scarf reading the paper under a Guinness sign.

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6. Dark wood and bench seating

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7. Energetic banter, much of it incomprehensible, even to Mrs RM

The breakdown of democracy within a federalist state

And then where will we be ?”

Exactly

8. A playlist that includes Bill Hailey and Pop Muzik by M

9. A sign for the Gentlemen’s loo that says “”Gentlemen”.  Rather than “Drakes”, weird arrows or pictures of animals you can’t identify.

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Pretty much full house in the Victoria then.  Pub Curmudgeon will think of a No. 10.

13 thoughts on ““PROPER PUB” BINGO IN BRENTWOOD

  1. “who now how”

    I was all set to read that as “how now (great) brown cow, or some such. 🙂

    And yes; the Victoria Arms looks a treat while the Dairyman looks a bloody travesty!

    Cheers

    Liked by 1 person

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