Beer Guide tickers, all 7 of us, seem very keen on stats. The % of new entries in the Guide, odds of a GBG22, and the decline in Covid rates required for pubs to reopen for GBG22 comes out.
At roughly 2pm each day we get the Covid hospital deaths courtesy of @UKcovidstats, and a couple of hours later the case rates (positive tests per 100,000 people for the last 7 days) for each Local Authority.
Until recently I could confidently have predicted the Top and Bottom 10, purely from my 56 years of observing human behaviour across the country.
But yesterday a surprise new Number 1 emerged from the pack;
Rutland ?
What, sleepy Rutland of the pashminas, public schools, appalling loo signs and tranquil waters ?
Yes, apparently so. OK, that only means 207 cases last week, but then there’s more people trying to solve the clues for that last post than live in our smallest county.
It’s only a couple of months since the residents of Stamford, condemned to Tier 3 (remember Tiers ?) were furious to discover they’d were in Lincolnshire rather than Rutland with all its (apparent) freedoms.
Every year I get to do one new Rutland tick; a cricket club, a Spoons, a gastro with sexist loos, and this year a legitimate boozer in upper class Uppingham.
It flatters to deceive. This looks like Bass but that glass is pure homebrew.
The most interesting thing about Rutland is the fertility rate. “In 2006 it was reported that Rutland has the highest fertility rate of any English county – the average woman having 2.81 children, compared with only 1.67 in Tyne and Wear” says Wiki.
Sadly, greater fertility is rarely compatible with a greater appetite for Proper Pubs.
At 1.07am this morning, I finally confirmed that Rutland’s place atop the Covid chart is due to the presence of Her Majesty’s Prison Stocken (nearest pub the 2008 Michelin Pub of the Year).
In case you’re wondering, this place is bottom of the league (and quite happy about it).
retiredmartin 
“purely from my 56 years of observing human behaviour across the country.”
Go on. 🙂
“What, sleepy Rutland of the pashminas, public schools, appalling loo signs and tranquil waters ?”
Don’t forget the high birth rate. Maybe a bunch of sprogs all, um, sprogged last week having inherited Covid from their birth, er, person? (I know, can’t say birth mother as it’s bad or something)
“in upper class Uppingham.”
For some reason, all I can think of is Monty Python’s ‘Upper Class Twit of the Year’ skit. 😉
“This looks like Bass but that glass is pure homebrew.”
Sacrilege!
“Sadly, greater fertility is rarely compatible with a greater appetite for Proper Pubs.”
I would have thought they matched nicely. They do in certain areas over here. 😉
( *cough* unwed mothers)
“At 1.07am this morning, I finally confirmed that Rutland’s place atop the Covid chart is due to the presence of Her Majesty’s Prison Stocken”
Ah. Although… it could be still be due to high fertility; what with anyone being able to declare themselves female and thus get put into the women’s prison.
“In case you’re wondering, this place is bottom of the league (and quite happy about it).”
Ah, Appledore. That serendipitously ties in with my comment on your Trees Growing out of Dead Pubs post that the Alma is named after the Crimean word for apple. 🙂
Cheers
LikeLiked by 1 person
“The % of new entries in the Guide, odds of a GBG22, and the decline in Covid rates required for pubs to reopen for GBG22 comes out.” Breaking news that GBG22 will see a c.20% reduction to around 3,600 entries must have sent a shiver through the Pub Tickers Massif. An EGM (on Zoom, with virtual pub backdrops and bottled Doom Bar in hand) needed?
LikeLiked by 1 person
Excellent news. Great decision. Will make ticking much easier !
LikeLike
That was a joke, by the way. Won’t make a great deal of difference as will still need to travel to the Scottish Isles, Channel Isles and West Wales etc etc !
LikeLike
Bottom of the league. Ah, Torridge. That’s because all summer they only served drinks to people with EX39 postcodes!
LikeLike
Did that happen to you too, John, or do you just remember my experience ?!
The “welcome” in Devon and Cornwall pubs was so unwelcoming I wished they hadn’t bothered.
LikeLike
No, just remembering your post from Bideford! Given the area’s dependence on tourism, they could be kinder to grockles!
LikeLiked by 1 person
I shouldn’t be unkind. They were genuinely terrified, though cases hardly increased at all through July and August, before shooting up in September. Wonder why !
LikeLike
The only reason Corby is so high is they haven’t finished their Hogmanay celebrations yet.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Have own (unique?) Spoons menu in Corby’s Samuel Lloyd and Saxon Crown.. Irn Bru, Haggis, and Neeps & Tatties all featured. (YTFC PSF 2018.)
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yep. Had haggis and Deuchars at the Samuel Lloyd 👍
LikeLike
Can’t beat the deep frid Irn Bru.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I do wonder how the Scots cope without pubs.
LikeLike
We don’t. Tis horrible. We have to spend time slagging of folk online whilst having intravenous Punk IPA.
LikeLiked by 1 person