Enough Manchester misery. Here’s some Cornish calamity.
And here’s that rolling itinerary I own you;
Yes, a mere 8 hours after leaving home, I was parked up for the night in the car park of the Quintrell Inn, enjoying a pint of craft;
Five minutes from nauseous Newquay, one stop on the train line, the Quintrell’s huge car park was scarily full when I tipped up at six.
Across the road the Premier Inn offered the calm mediocrity of Table Table, but the Quintrell was packing them in with a closed fun factory, superhero comic display, fish tanks and Rishi-funded half-price carvery.
And a sign saying “Please”.
I said “Please” when I asked for my Doom Bar, the connoisseur’s choice from a range of Doom Bar or Doom Bar.
Guess the NBSS score.
My actual new GBG tick was 2 minutes walk away. As I left the car park, a car screeched to a halt yards from me, a furious guy of about 30 screaming and waving a can of Strongbow in the air.
Had I dropped it ? I mouthed “What ?” at him.
“I’m talking to my f*****g mum” he screamed at me, waving his can in the direction of a lady of about 44 in another car 20 yards away. It was a classy joint.
The Two Clomes WAS a classy joint, which didn’t much seem to want my custom.
“Have you booked ?”
Me ? Book ?
Rishi’s half-price dishes had filled the pubs of Newquay on Tuesday night, and I was lucky to be allowed to enter the bar and collect a pint of Sea Fury to consume in the garden.
“Wot no Doom Bar ?! ” I hear you ask.
Yes, sometimes I can be a beer geek too, you know.
It’s a bit like Doom Bar Reserve, I guess, and well worth a 3.5. To be blunt (Spoiler), one of the best pints I had all week.
Groups of all ages came and went, just as they did in the Quintrell. That’s what I want to see in pubs.
But if you’re expecting anything more from Quintrell Downs itself, brace yourself for massive disappointment.