WISBECH WISE MEN WIND BRAPA UP

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I’ve just got back from taking Matt to his Architects gig in Cardiff.  A good night, only let down by non-existent Wi-Fi at the Future Inn.  If the future is internet free then you can keep it.

A week ago I was escorting BRAPA to his long-awaited Wisbech tick.

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On these trips I always feel obliged to bore Si with lots of historic detail about the likes of Octavia Hill, my Dad’s trips to Wisbech plant auctions, and the scarcity of the town’s GBG entries over two decades.  His feigned interest is a thing of beauty.

To be fair, the Elgood’s pubs are exceptionally shabby, and we only had 30 minutes free parking, which meant a sprint to the Red Lion to fit in his statutory 27.5 minute stay.

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Si in a hurry, missing the beauty of the Hare & Hounds

You can read about Wisbech here (the one with the Isaac Newton death mask).

There’s still traces of Georgian loveliness along the North Brink. The landlady at Leverington had attempted to lure us to a tour of the Elgoods brewery and gardens and Peckover House is one of the less boring National Trust properties.

The Red Lion is about as grand as the pubs get.

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Si already inside, looking for the loo

We reduced the average age inside the pub by about 4.433 years. At the bar with the Old Boys, Simon noted everyone was drinking Amstel.  I urged Si to go for the Cambridge; it might be his only chance to drink Elgood’s while doing the Beer Guide.

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Amstel drinkers don’t lie

Too late.  The nearest fellow, a posh chap reading the Times, told him the “Mortal Wombat” was very popular. “Dangerous drinkable” I think the quote was, clearly taken straight off the tasting notes.

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Anyway, it wasn’t good, judging by Si’s face.  More condition in my seventh coffee of the day, supplied by one of those machines that were futuristic in Wimpy in 1982.

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Looks better than it was apparently

To cheer him up, I directed Simon the wrong way to the toilets, so the locals could have a good laugh.  It also allowed him to shout “Bastard !” when he did find the Gents, apparently.

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Simon told off for saying “Bastard”

A pleasant pub for the mature drinker and gentlefolk who enjoy lunches “with all the trimmings“.  Russ will applaud the correct spelling of Beef Bourguignon, of course.

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We had to rush to get back to the car before the 30 minutes was up, or a man from Walsoken turns up to crush your car.

 

 

25 thoughts on “WISBECH WISE MEN WIND BRAPA UP

      1. Whatever Russ’s views on your spelling of the beef dish I’m almost certain he’ll point out the typos in the 3rd and 4th pars.
        For the record Munster v Exeter was a pile of shite and Limerick is even more of a dump than I remembered.

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      2. You lot would be more sympathetic if you knew the conditions I’m working under at the moment; the internet is so poor my mouse is working about 3 minutes behind my fingers !

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      3. ” I’m almost certain he’ll point out the typos in the 3rd and 4th pars.”

        Caught the one in the 3rd para but totally missed the apostrophe in the 4th; partly because brand names can be a bit dodgy. 🙂

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  1. “His feigned interest is a thing of beauty.” –This made me laugh! In my imagination, Simon hangs on your every word, regarding you as the seasoned climber who’s going to make it to the top of Everest before he does.

    Not sure if there is a beer drinker’s saying that goes “Don’t judge a beer by its name”. But really, they weren’t doing themselves any favors when they decided to call the thing Mortal Wombat!

    Whenever I see reference to a Red Lion, I always think, “Cathy Price has been there.” 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Simon just yawns, but that’s mainly because he was probably up at 5pm to catch the train south !

      I was convinced that beer must be called Mortal Kombat, which is almost as bad.

      Almost tempted to look for Cathy’s Wisbech report but I’m not sure there’s an index or search facility ;-(

      Liked by 1 person

  2. “If the future is internet free then you can keep it.”
    Hear, hear!
    “His feigned interest is a thing of beauty.”
    He’s a banker; they’re known for their feigning. 😉
    “Si in a hurry, missing the beauty of the Hare & Hounds”
    What the bloody hell does he carry around in the rucksack/backpack?
    “Si already inside, looking for the loo”
    Never get between Si and the loo!
    “told him the “Mortal Wombat” was very popular.”
    Never go for the really bad punny ones.
    “I directed Simon the wrong way to the toilets, so the locals could have a good laugh.”
    Hang on, four photos above this had him already inside looking for the loo. How many pints had he had if he’d already forgotten? 😉
    “Simon told off for saying “Bastard””
    The irony is palpable.

    “Russ will applaud the correct spelling of Beef Bourguignon, of course.”
    I was thinking the ‘a’ in Chicken Korma was poorly printed. 🙂
    Cheers

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