retiredmartin

Obviously, I know what the Borders are, except it’s difficult to explain why they don’t include Dumfriesshire.

Harder to recall where they start and stop.

“Anyway, I’ve fallen for the common misconception that Hadrian’s Wall separates England from Scotland.  It doesn’t, you’ve got another big chunk of Northumberland to get through.  How has it taken me 40 years on this planet to learn this fact?   Time to get in the pub …….“

In 2019 Simon still thought that Scotland started at Hadrian’s Wall, and perhaps it should again.

Here’s someone in the Borders looking quizzically at BRAPA.

Don’t panic, I haven’t really picked the Horseshoe in Eddleston, despite that wonderful lamp/sign.

What’s to say about the Borders ? Deep fried ice cream, unheralded coast (Burnmouth, below),

and a helpful system of stickers telling you which pubs are in the GBG without you needing to refer to the book (since 110% of cask pubs are Guided).

Quite tough picking my first five from the eighteen in the book, but Kelso is a decent pub town these days, and the beer quality was surprisingly high.

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I could, at a stretch, have picked three pubs around this cobbled square, wo why do you get this one ?

Kelso – Rutherfords

Was it the test tubes to show you what colour the (NBSS 4) beer looks like ?

Or the colour scheme ?

Or the obsession with trepanning (don’t look it up) ?

All of that, but mainly because it hits the sweet spot between middle class gin bar and Old Boys boozer as well as anywhere.

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Next off to Hawick, a town that didn’t seem to believe is fancy gin bars, and whose Spoons produced one of the worst pints in years, while the Old Boys bar produced the best.

Hawick – Exchange Bar

How is the Exchange aka Daltons not legendary in pub circles ?

Perhaps it is, if you live in Hawick (pronounced “Oik”).

Bit quiet on a Tuesday night, but a warm welcome,

a comfy seat, and a lone pump dispensing an NBSS 4.5 Campbell’s Gunner.

“It’s very popular” said the wonderfully cheery barmaid. Sometimes that means “I sold one of those on Sunday“.  Not here.

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Peebles – Bridge Inn (Trust)

Peebles is more akin to Kelso, its top pub sharing frontage with a smart looking Italian bistro, and the Old Boys wearing stylish (Autumn) sweaters,

As cosy as it gets, but never chintzy,

But (gorgeous, chewy Jarl apart) the best thing is the potential for ticker torment.

Officially the Bridge Inn, known by all as The Trust, and with a tiled entrance saying “Tweedside”.

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I wanted to have Duns on this list, a representative from the farming plains to the west, birthplace of Jim Clark and a pleasing stone town.

But there’s more open Chinese takeaways and hairdressers than pubs these days,

and my pick is “temporarily closed” so get your equerry to phone ahead before visiting.

Duns – Black Bull

Actually, the Black Bull felt a bit tenuous in 2018,

paper signs and all.

“The sparkle comes from the barmaid and two boys who tip up at 11.10, surprised to see I’ve beat them, and settle in at the bar with the Tennents. Actually, that’s unfair. You can see one of them was on his way home with the Co-op bag. Eventually.“

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Galashiels – Hunters Hall

There’s more traditional pubs in Galashiels, the Haverhill of the North, I did them with Curry Charles when trying out the new Borders rail line.

But that would be deeply unfair on the Spoons, whose cask was cheap nectar,

and who had just introduced their new quinoa dish on our 2018 visit. Mrs RM stuck to wings.

Pub entertainment came from the Abbot man trying to out me as “a CAMRA” at the bar, who for reasons unknown was playing “Stuck in the middle with you” on his I-Phone.  I believe it’s still the current No.1 in Galashiels.

So that’s my 5. What’s your 6th ?