April 13th. Day 2 of the Great (Semi) Reopening. Oh, and “EVERY PUB IN SHEFFIELD ON FOOT – No. 1“.
We stayed local.
When we arrived in Sheffield back before Christmas, the Walkley Cottage looked like this;
Now, new landlord installed in time for the 12th, the scaffolding has gone, but my dodgy photography (I blame the sun) thankfully remains.
Mrs RM had to drop a hard disk at the house of a bloke who was re-installing my entire collection of digital music after it was swiped when we moved house. I’m very suspicious about this digital fad, but will be very glad to get my Boney M B-sides back.
After Manic Monday had seen us both fail to get a seat for a beer, I was despatched to hog a table in the garden 20 minutes before opening while this technical stuff happened.
Obviously you can’t just sit down at a table, you have to do the whole “Squirt, Sign-in, Seated” thing, so at least I got a view of the inside.
The Cottage had been, as they say, “rammed” on opening night. Out of my eyeline, a local lady came to the door just to ask whether they’d been busy.
“My “partner” likes beer, he’ll visit. But save some wine for me ! Ha ha“
She then asked whether she could book on-line but claimed not to have Facebook, presumably because of the Zuckerberg thing.
Oooh look, a beer menu.
I was tempted to order for Mrs RM, but she turned up just before the cheery bloke came back to the table.
“Two pints of the Bradfield Blonde please“
“Sorry, we sold out a week’s supply of the ale yesterday“
You’re then obliged to say things like “Well done you !” and “Better beer selling fast than sitting in the pipes” and “Well, another John Smith’s Smooth it is then“.
Goodness, that looks decadent. Pasta, calamari rings and fluffy chips. Comfort food in the sun, I guess.
I’m getting a bit too used to the Smooth, and sank two pints in the hour.
We were joined in the garden by your archetypal masked-up dungaree wearing Sheffield family, who looked at us and headed for the plastic rocking horse. The squeals of the children (Emma and Rosie) were a delight.
As was the Walkley.
NB : One other thing of note. The bill was £29.15, not bad. “Call it £35” I said, handing over two £20 notes. A minute later, back comes the lass with a fiver and 85p in coins. “Oh, keep the change” I say, gesturing at the coins. “You sure ?” she asks, then seems confused when I withdraw the fiver.
For five marks, explain this. With diagrams.
retiredmartin 
Pity the poor fella that has to reinstall all your vinyl to digital. You do know digital is being phased out and won’t even be available from 2024 so you’ll only have to lathe cut it all back to wax anyway!…
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This was all digital music transferred from CDs !
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Bradfield Blonde had been drinking very well then.
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Only the one cask beer on, Paul. That’s the answer.
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The sad bit being that the week’s supply was one cask.
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Sheffield Hatter also said that was probably the case !
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“Goodness, that looks decadent. Pasta, calamari rings and fluffy chips. Comfort food in the sun, I guess.”
Yorkshire pasta looks suspiciously like chips!
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Yorkshire pasta (with halloumi) not shown)😔
Certainly decadent!
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When you gave her £40 and said “call it £35” she will have rung £35 into the till, which correctly calculated £5.85 change, and she then put £5 into the tips jar. You intended a tip of £5.85 with £5 back out of your £40. She’d already kept £5 and you gave her “the change” of 85p, so you have both ended up with what you intended.
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Where’s the diagrams 🤔
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Betcha never chucked a smooth into a plant pot.
Smooth is drinking beer
Cask is urinal cleaner.
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“We stayed local.”
Best that way as there’s no fighting over who’s the DES (unless you plan on taking local transport everywhere).
“but my dodgy photography (I blame the sun) thankfully remains.”
I see they’ve upgraded from a small TV antenna (top photo) to a satellite dish!
“with views over the Rivelin Valley to die for, if not actually to capture on film.”
Google maps will suffice. 🙂
“but will be very glad to get my Boney M B-sides back.”
I interpreted that as Boney M(artin) B(ack)-sides… so, you’re saying that your backside is boney? 😉
“you have to do the whole “Squirt, Sign-in, Seated” thing”
You might want to replace ‘squirt’ with ‘sanitise’. 😉
” I picked the sun.”
What? No Daily Mail?
“She then asked whether she could book on-line but c”
Not on FB either, but that’s because they’res only so many hours in a day!
“Oooh look, a beer menu.”
I’m guessing Farmers Blonde.
““Sorry, we sold out a week’s supply of the ale yesterday“”
Eek! Back to good old John Smiths then.
“I’m getting a bit too used to the Smooth, and sank two pints in the hour.”
Or, it could mean you were simply enjoying yourself.
“For five marks, explain this. With diagrams.”
No diagrams but how about using the old missing dollar riddle:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Missing_dollar_riddle
Also, good lord! I get something similar when I had the cashier $20.15 for a $15.15 bill and the cashier is amazed she doesn’t have to give me any spare change back.
This is why they should build more nuclear reactors. Folks will then soon have more than just five fingers on each hand, thus they’ll be able to properly figure out how much change to give back. 😉
Cheers
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The Walkley Cottage looks like a lovely little pub indeed. Well worth that 15 minute uphill slog, no doubt.
Sorry to hear about the music situation. What exactly happened, if you don’t mind saying? I know music means a lot to you, so you must have been unnerved to find yourself deprived of it, if even just temporarily.
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The Walkley is a fairly typical Sheffield pub, similar in feel to that Bulls Head on the edge of Macclesfield we were mentioning earlier.
Oh don’t worry, the music is all there, the IT man recovered it and is putting it on a new hard disk (I have no idea what this means, I thought it was all in the Cloud).
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A pub you can walk to = H E A V E N !
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