My average time in a pub is 18.36 minutes. Well (too) shy of BRAPA and his 27.5, but rather more than the professional ticking of the professionals. I once saw Maltmeister nip in and out of a Manx pub in 45 seconds, and he thought that was slacking.

When Mrs RM joins me the average is 27.44 minutes, and only 12.10 of those are her inevitable trip to the loo (AFTER we’re ready to go).

I spent 31 minutes in the Lower Turk’s Head last Wednesday, and it’s all down to Boy George and Ivan Eugene Doroschuk (who ?).

Great pub, as I’ve already told you, but it was the superbly naff soundtrack that pinned me to the bench seats.

So, “What music did Manc pubs play in the war, Daddy ?”

15:10 – Human League – Solid start.

15:14 – Bananarama – OK I guess.

15:18 Men Without Hats – ooh, don’t hear this much. I still have the 12″.

15:25 Kajagoogoo – stonewall classic.

15:30 – Culture Club, but THIS one.

Cancel all plans. And finally,

15:37 Propaganda

OK, OK, should be Dr Mabuse, but it’ll do.

The Old Boys at the bar discussing Babycham and Cherry Mild appreciated it as much as the ladies who drink Prosecco. Then “Gold” came on and it was time to go.

Some good music in the next pub, too….


      1. If I comment on the phone rather than the PC I can include proper emojis 😺

        I share Bill’s view of The Safety Dance 😊

        Liked by 1 person

    1. There’s something deeply disturbing about that Safety Dance video. I was just waiting for the Wicker Man to make an appearance, and some poor unfortunate victim dragged off to be consumed by fire.

      Think I’m joking, there was a set of gallows up on the hillside at 2:45?


      1. T’other Paul,
        The maypole reminds me of happier times this month sixty-two to sixty years ago at my infants school.

        Liked by 1 person

  1. Nothing cheesy about The Safety Dance, great song and the best music video of all time. Filmed in West Kington, Wiltshire, at the fag-end of the Cotswolds, which unfortunately doesn’t have a GBG pub.

    Liked by 1 person

      1. I remember good pubs in Weston Turville while spending eight nights in the Red Lion at Wendover for courses at nearby Halton during March 2000


  2. Well, I’d been thinking of going to the Lower Turks Head when the Rhinos play at Salford this Sunday, but your description of the compulsory music offerings has changed my mind. Thanks for the heads up.

    By way of reward, I’ll tell you that according to my spreadsheet I have spent a total of 10 days, 3 hours and 15 minutes in pubs so far this year. (Or 240 and a quarter hours.) As I have made 428 separate visits to pubs, that works out at an average of 34 minutes per visit (or 0.56834 hours). Longest was a mammoth 3 hours 30 minutes in the Dog & Partridge drinking three pints of Blue Bee Triple Hop – I know it’s a beer that deserves savouring but that’s ridiculous. But I have to believe the spreadsheet, because what cannot speak cannot lie.

    My shortest pub visit was yesterday, when a navigational error delivered me to my final pub just three minutes before the bus was due – and I’d already missed the bus I would have caught if I hadn’t misread Google maps (possibly due to the sun glinting on the screen of my phone) and walked nearly three miles further than planned. I then spent longer sussing which beer was going to be the easiest to drink than it actually took to drink it.

    And then the bus was 90 seconds late – could have had another!

    Liked by 2 people

      1. That’s what I thought I said too. Perhaps I should check my spreadsheet – you think there should have been more than that?

        Anyway, joking aside, you just wait until you reach retirement age, young man. You’ll find you’ll have plenty of time on your hands for going to the pub at any time of day if you want. But probably you’ll have lined up more worthwhile things to do once you’ve given up working 9 to 5.

        What is it you do again? My memory’s not as good as it used to be.

        Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s