People talk about Damacene conversions. Like Saul of Tarsus, and Pete Allen ditching Carling for Bass, and Chukka joining the Greens next week.

A real Damascene conversion will be me seeing the light and telling you “Maidenhead is magic” .

It’s not. It’s a dump that exists only to make Slough look good, which it does effortlessly. Visit the car park behind the Bear and tell me I’m wrong.

I had a sober(ing) day there while Mrs RM ate white sandwiches and “things on sticks” in her team meeting by the Thames.

At least we got a night in a Conference centre in Cookham out if it.

Sadly, after testing the Doom Bar in Banbury Mrs RM wasn’t up to a night on the town in Cookham, even with the lure of Rebellion at the UK’s poshest pub,

Bel & the Dragon

or the mysterious pumps in the conference bar,

Cask or keg?

and even rejected the morning walk on the Moor.

The moors, apparently

These Maidenhead shindigs are monthly so I may get another chance.

But then I’ll probably get Mrs RM to book somewhere closer to the legendary GBG pubs in the ‘Head.

Since I was chauffering, I can’t bring you the local views on Boris from the Cons Club or the nearby Honeypot Bar (Almasty seasonals, I guess).

Maidenhead is still a building site, 3 years after my last visit, and the Spoons as scruffy as ever.

For some peace I wandered across the Thames to Ray Mill Island and joined a queue for an ice cream which I left when I realised a cone was £3.

Building works round the phone box
Untried Boulters pub . Probably great

Mrs RM was as pleased to hit the A308(M) as I was.

“Some people have to LIVE there” I reminded her.


  1. Thanks for that first photo. My pub/beer guide for YTFC fans trekking to soddin’ Maidenhead next season, our only previous visit being losing a replay in Round One of the AC Delco Cup in 1985 – which I inexplicably gave a miss, for some reason – writes itself, I see. 🤣

    Liked by 2 people

  2. For my sins Maidenhead was the town where I had my very first pub going experience. My Great Uncle and Aunt ran The Ark in Ray Street. I was aged about 8 at the time.

    Liked by 1 person


    I am in top form with regards to decorum lately. 😉

    “Like Saul of Tarsus”

    I’ve seen his well in Tarsus.

    “and Pete Allen ditching Carling for Bass”

    Was he well?

    “and Chukka joining the Greens next week.”

    Definitely unwell. Hence the green colour. 🙂

    “and telling you “Maidenhead is magic” .”

    I’m having to work hard at being decorous today.

    “Visit the car park behind the Bear and tell me I’m wrong.”

    The photo below that looks like the ever burning tire fire in the Simpsons.

    “and “things on sticks””

    Most caterers will put sticks through their sandwiches to stop them from falling apart during transport. 🙂

    “Bel & the Dragon”

    Is that a ripoff of Beauty (Belle) and the Beast?

    “Cask or keg?”

    You sure the one on the left doesn’t just dispense cashews without the shell?

    “and even rejected the morning walk on the Moor.”

    I turn down the occasional request by the missus for a walk. That way I always leave her wanting moor. 😉

    “Untried Boulters pub . Probably great”

    Naw. They don’t even have a mobility scooter in the reserved handicap spot.



Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s