Another year, another TWO more new Beer Guide entries in Leyland, Lancashire, which is clearly aspiring to be the next Chorley.
Alliterative possibilities abound; just as well since you can only use that “Leyland Motors On” title once.
So what would make you stop off here on your way to Blackpool Punk Fest ?
Not much. Leyland is about the same size as St Neots and about as exciting, once you’ve been round the Road Transport Museum (preferably while you’re aged 8).
The town centre is a bit functional by the standards of the competition.
But it takes a firm line in the divisive cob v bap v barm debate,
And the people are, consecutively, cheery/scary/drunk. Of course (coincidentally), there’s loads of good pubs with cheap beer.
The Gables is the sort of converted red brick place you get on the Fylde coast serving cheap roasts to Retired Gentlefolk.
Which in this case is me, a £6.95 Sunday dinner washed down with decent Dizzy Blonde (NBSS 3) (when will they fix that pump clip).
Top Lancashire service, a barman impersonating Andy Pipkin (“Ooh, I’ll ‘ave that one“) and Midlake‘s “Courage of Others” LP playing, seemingly for my sole benefit.
But never mind that. Come here for the cludgie.
Sadly, I can’t bring you much of the toilet humour, which would keep Russ in jokes for 6 months.
A bit of a corker, and the sort of Proper Pub that does still get in the Guide up here.
There ought to be a Guide to Proper Sweet Shoppes, too. I filled my boots here.
In complete contrast to The Gables, the Golden Tap Ale House has the plain micro exterior we know and love, a gazillion beers, and weird 2pm opening.
No Andy Pipkins impersonators or sexist pump clips here, just friendly service, some interesting beer not out of place in Stockport (an Ilkley Shandy was NBSS 3.5), and Lemon Jelly on the stereo.
I realise I’m supposed to say something cutting about small pubs and high seating, comparing it to Proper Pubs, but I’m feeling generous. Both pubs Leyland lounges were lush.
retiredmartin 
How can you tell the demeanour of the locals when the pub appears to be deserted?
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That’s the 3 folk outside the Spoons I was commenting on ;-0
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BTW, what’s with this sudden urge to be first to post? I thought your average readers were approximately in their fifties, not 8?!
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Prizes for commenting first. Fizzy sherbert dips from the sweet shop.
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Second childhood. I’ve been round that museum when I was about 25.
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I am 8!
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yup
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That’s the audience Martin has been aiming for all along!
I think he realised that post Harry Potter the world of children’s books was in dire need of a new superstar author; expect to see the “Touring Britain in Search of the perfect pint of Donnington” racing up the book charts this time next year, essentially holiday reading for primary schoolkids everywhere.
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I’m playing a long game, aiming to get Mark Crilley to illustrate these books with pictures of hilarious pub folk nicked from Simon’s blog. Children love Proper Pubs.
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Is a real “Proper Pub” one where you have unattended kids sitting outside, bottle of coke with a straw and a packet of plain crisps?
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Never mind the pump clip, when are they going to do something about the beer?
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Boo ! Boo !
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They’ve got the new demure version at the Olde Cottage in Chester, along with such fine BBBs as Butcombe and Otter 😀
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Yes, there’s a pub pitching for a visit from Beer & Pubs Forum if ever I saw one.
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Can’t believe you missed out the collection of teapots at The Gables. They even have an owl one.
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“Ooh look, Cheryl, ‘ees found that fancy filter on his phone”
If that’s not true, I don’t think it’s too far away. 🙂
“Can you See the Lizards ?”
Why yes… yes I can. But then, I doubt you’re talking about the European Wall Lizards over in my neck of the woods:
https://www.bcreptiles.ca/lizards/eurowall.htm
“But it takes a firm line in the divisive cob v bap v barm debate,”
This is beginning to look like a version of the various dialects in the UK. 😉
“Of course (coincidentally), there’s loads of good pubs with cheap beer.”
(slow golf clap)
“A former surgery, apparently”
They should have called in The Carvery instead. 🙂
“Proper roasties”
At a decent price.
“Filth”
Some of those are pretty good. 🙂
“I filled my boots here.”
They do prescriptions as well? 😉
“All your crafty favourites”
At crafty prices!
“I realise I’m supposed to say something cutting about small pubs and high seating,”
You? Cutting? Get out! (LOL)
Cheers
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Definitely barm cakes in that part of the world
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It’s a muffin !
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