Today the post comes courtesy of Mrs RM.

A precondition of being allowed to live at retiredmartin Towers is that you produce a blog.  Son 2 makes an occasional update to his metalcore site, but Son 1 has been forced to leave the house in disgrace following his failure to even start a blog about obscure computer games.

Mrs RM has toyed with blogging, setting up a response site to mine where she gets to slag me off. No posts yet, mind.

So I’m giving her a hand, showing just how easy this blogging lark is with a half decent phone (or better still the new expensive one Mrs RM seems to buy every 3 months).

This is a report on her late night trip to Edinburgh’s Oxford Bar while she’s working in the Scottish Borders.

Start with a map snipped from Ordnance Survey, marked with key pints points.

edinburgh Mrs RM.PNG
From (A) Hotel to (B) Oxford Bar

Add some nice shots of Edinburgh for that all important “sense of place“, but don’t do anything obvious like show us the castle or haggis shop. Oh no.

On my way to Oxford bar !”

It’s Christmas

Add an atmospheric exterior shot of the pub.

Dark Streets of Oxford Old Town

Make sure you get a photo of a full pint so people know you’re a proper #PubWoman, not a half pint cheat.

Pub Life

Even better if the people in it are wearing a hipster hat.

Cut and paste an ironic tweet that starts with “So

Add a few reflections about the experience.

It was very basic but friendly

Blokes having really interesting convo about pubs, places they’d been. I couldn’t join in cos I was a girl

The barman smiled at me when I ordered a pint”  (never happens to me)

I was very self-conscious about my rucksack

Finally, add a quiz for your North American readers.

For five marks Name those beers !

Forget to score the beer, and sign off.  “Off back now“.

Promise something clearly undeliverable.

Some pictures of Scotsmen drinking excellent real ale tomorrow”

See. It’s easy this blogging.


Addendum: Note that the Oxford has now run out of beer and leave your audience to draw their own conclusions.


  1. “For five marks Name those beers !”

    I could barely make out the A and B on the map so there’s no hope of figuring this one out.

    Also, am I doing something wrong? I can’t see any bloody pictures of Old Town, Pub Life etc. 😉


    Liked by 1 person

      1. Just back from a micro pub in Southend that she might write up; I thought she was going to confront a lady reading out a round robin Christmas letter very loudly, which would have made good blog material.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. A point of fact on Mrs RM’s latest phone purchases. Two phones, one each for two sons who have pleaded poverty/lost/broken phones and have received early Christmas presents. One phone for Mr RM who’s knowledge of technology is inversely proportional to his knowledge of beer and geography and who could not be safely left on his own in a phone shop armed only with his recently acquired vague understanding of the difference between WiFi and data. Mrs RM buys Mr RM’s cars for similar reasons!

    Liked by 3 people

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