retiredmartin

October 2026. Hastings. East Sussex.

My big shopping day in Hastings comprised; two pink Stabilo Boss markers, a pack of TePe interdental brushes, a comb, a five pack of Primark boxers (pic available to Patronised readers etc) and an order for a new pair of AI glasses.

Yes, AI glasses, which I presume will tell you how to get to any pub in the UK. We shall see, literally.

Pleased with my splurge, I sought out a pub to waste half an hour before the homeward train.

Not that time in a pub is ever wasted. You’ll see from the CAMRA pub map above that there’s two distinct lines of pubs in Hastings; the classic ale houses along the Old Town and a hotch potch of basic boozers and modern bars in the New.

Well, I’m definitely in New Town, and I’ve started a non-award winning series of the pubs in lesser Hastings, so let’s see what the (General) Havelock has to offer, apart from the greatest pictorial tiling in England.

Let’s have the full description;

“Included as a Heritage Pub for its exceptional tiled paintings, described by the Tiles & Architectural Ceramics Society as “amongst the candidates for the best turn-of-the-century pub tile scheme in Britain”. Other magnificent displays of tiled paintings can be found at Café Royal, Edinburgh; Mountain Daisy, Sunderland; Central Bar, Leith; Rose Villa Tavern, Birmingham; St James Tavern W1; Dolphin, Hackney, London E8; and the Golden Cross, Cardiff.”

You’d struggle to see the heritage on entry (once you’ve failed to enter via the door opposite the Spoons), though the mobility scooter tells you this is a Proper Pub.

A Proper Pub without cask, dropped by Craft Union after the 2023 floods (no, I can’t quite see the connection either).

Just before I go for Guinness, I see the advert for cider from the fridge.

Now, I know you’re supposed to care about whether it’s real cider or not, but I really don’t. But the tasty Heck’s Perry is real, anyway, and at £4.35 a pint a bit of a steal. Great welcome, too.

A typical Craft Union, otherwise, a drinkers pub with England’s cricket capitulation your TV entertainment.

Morten sums it up well.

I tried not to look like that bloke who was just there to admire the tiling, but that’s hard when all you’re doing is taking surreptitious photos of the wall.

As so often in Craft Union, the soundtrack is “almost” contemporary R & B tinged pop.

Fifth Harmony are, apparently, the most successful girl group of the 21st century. I’m sure you knew that.

Blimey, perry goes straight to your head, doesn’t it ?