March 2026. York.
You might think the hardest part of the pub ticking game, the toughest in the world, is working out which one of the sods are going to deign to actually be open when you tip up.
But actually it’s the logistics of travel, deciding whether to take the campervan to Guisborough or risk a bus trip from Middlesbrough in which you’ll inevitably need a loo break you can’t take, and then guess where to break your rail journey to save a fiver (Derby).
So I still haven’t made it to Guisborough Brewery Tap with its Friday 3-8, Saturday 3-7 hours timed to coincide exactly with Storm “Dave” today (why always Dave ?), but last Saturday I did finally make it to Malton, changing at York.
You’d think we’d visit York more often, wouldn’t you ? Only an hour from home, one of the top cities in the world, and relatively safe once BRAPA has left town.
Great Domestos pun, Si.
I used to have someone visit this blog and tell us the Good Beer Guide was rubbish and we should “ask a local for pub recommendations“. Well, I had 22 minutes to kill at York station, time for a pint ?
The York Tap still smelt a bit “fusty” to me (no comment on visiting Woking fans heading to York’s meccano ground that afternoon), and the station bar was just too dull.
So I asked Si, and Si suggested “a pre-emptive Dubliner“. Well, why not, a short hop along the wall the Romans used to use for quick pints between trains.
Much gnashing of teeth has followed the recent conversion of renowned riverside cask shrine The Maltings to an “Irish” pub.
You’re probably expecting me to say The Dubliner is a vast improvement now they’ve got rid of all that twiggy brown bitter and reduced the beer range to Guinness and Madri, but managed to remain impressively scruffy.
But I’m aware of the special place the Maltings holds in the heart of Pub Men, so I won’t.
But…2,956 pints in a week !
Actually, that’s less than one a minute (do the math, Dick).
It’s 11:49 and the Dubliner (a tiny pub) is already packed as I take my £6.30 pint to find a seat. It’s not a patch on the Guinness I had in Tuxford last month (NGSS 3).
Six lads from Hull give me a “Go away” look as I joined them in the bench seats in the weird little snug, probably because they were talking about girls. It doesn’t put me off.
They ask what I’m doing, I tell them I’m heading to Malton, they’ve no idea where that is despite it being the next station east.
They’re slow drinkers, sipping their Madri while I finish my Guinness by 11:54.
If I had to give those youngsters life advice it would be “A 5 minute Guinness is a bad idea”.
retiredmartin 
2956 – no wonder that there’s a Guinness shortage.
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That’s equivalent to six hogsheads which is about the volume of cask beer an average sized Midlands or Northern pub would shift in a week during the ‘seventies and ‘eighties, which only goes to show how little beer most pubs sell nowadays.
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Indeed. And I expect the Maltings, sorry Dubliner, has one of the highest beer volumes in York.
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Is that Guinness score board a one off type boast?
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A pub by me (Whimsey, Willenhall) with the current landlord celebrating his 1st anniversary posted some stats.
93,859 products sold
Only 4,586 pints of Guinness (16,209 pints of Carling)
It is only a small pub.
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I remember the Whimsey, Neil, Proper Pub.
16,209 pints of Carling in a year equates to less than one an hour !
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Yeah, didn’t think sounded a lot
They’ve tried ale but hasn’t really took off, but it seems to be ticking over.
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