retiredmartin

February 2024. Fakenham.

Returning from Battersea on Wednesday morning as Mum had a doctor’s appointment, Mrs RM stayed on for a day to visit Tate Modern and see “Book of Mormon” (great, apparently). I was jealous, and not just because I’d have knocked off a half dozen Guide pubs in what has been an unproductive month.

Having seen his name pop up a few times in those “Half a dozen pubs…” posts, I decided to catch up with Curry Charles in Dereham.

It’s what Dave Gedge would have wanted.

By a stroke of luck, Charles was home, and I had time for a penultimate Norfolk tick just up the road on the edge of Fantastic Fakenham.

Well, it might be “Fantastic” now, though it wasn’t on my last visit just before Covid, when I confidently told you it was a town to detain you for 72 seconds, and 60 of those would be used ordering on your Spoons app.

In 2024 Fakenham has zero Guide entries, bar Sculthorpe Mill over the main road to Cromer.

If we’re very lucky BRAPA will attempt a short cut and ignore that Be Careful sign at the water’s edge.

It’s the sort of pub that in Hampshire would be run by Brunning & Pricey and be packed,

but Fakenham isn’t Farnham and there’s just a few gentlefolk with pashminas finishing their lunch.

No staff at the bar, but you are greeted by The Police’s 14th best song (it says on Wiki).

Are The Police, like Dire Straits and Supertramp, ripe for critical re-evaluation ?

No.

I don’t mind a few seconds to myself at the bar; far better than being asked “What you ‘aving guvnor ?” as you enter the room.

I’m not fussed about the perusing of the “wickets” that so exercises the CAMRAs, but I am entranced by the smell of freshly baked sausage rolls.

“If you’re lucky they’ll still be warm” says the young lady suddenly emerging from the back.

Well, I hadn’t had lunch, how could I resist ? It was astonishingly good, cool and “chewy” in fact (NSRSS 4.5), though the Wherry was tasty but on the Arctic shade of cold (NBSS 3+).

A perfect pit stop, in fact.

“Just a pit stop ?” asked the barmaid. Yep.

“Much exciting the rest of the day ?“. Well, Dereham.

And here’s the thing; it all seemed entirely natural conversation with an Old Codger, genuinely inquiring rather than following a manual. Young folk, in pubs at least, seem much more able to hold a conversation with older folk than many give them credit for.

It made the pub, which is pleasant but probably works best if you’re here for a full meal.

A rare chance to experience the “real feel” of the Norfolk Coast, too.

Sadly, I could only manage a short catch-up with Charles as Mum gets worried if I’m out after dark (about 4pm), but I did get to see Dereham’s new Starbucks, and take a can of 11.2% Imperial Brown Ale home for Mrs RM.

She loved it, Charles.