February 2024. Uttoxeter.
No offence at all to local CAMRA, but if ever a town was ill-represented by its GBG entries it’s Uttoxeter.
A population of 14,014, occasionally doubled at race meetings, with 20 entries on What Pub but just a couple of micros in the Guide most years.
Nothing wrong with the Horse & Dove or the Night Inn, of course, but they hardly give an indication of the wealth of Bass joys to be found here. A bit like Bristol omitting the Youngs Ordinary pubs.
But what about Pedigree ?
What Pub tells me the Dapple Grey is your Pedi go-to in the ‘tox (as the kidz would call it if there were kidz), and you know my affection for pubs with wooden horses heads outside,
and a 21st century Marston Pizza Pub where the only entrance is via the car park.
I detest that word “wickets” to describe hand pumps, but here they are indeed “wickets”, as the Dapple Grey proves itself an adherent to the “One pump is plenty” philosophy.
An ambitious £4.55, but it’s a cool, tasty pint that looks sulphurous, whatever its brewing credentials (bor-ing). Not quite as good as Sheffield’s suburban diner Pedi, but good enough.
But the truly astonishing thing is how many people there are in here on a wet Thursday night in February. I reckon close to a hundred.
All playing the pub quiz.
“Hope you’ve all done the picture round“
“No phones, please“
“In order of inheritance, who are the first 3 female successors to the throne“
OK, it’s less fun than “swingers hotels in Newark”, but it pays the pub bills.
Something for everyone on offer,
even the few drinkers.
As I jumped the large fence separating the car park from the town, I nearly fell into the path of the (massively delayed) 18:45 to Doveridge.
And then, with a shock, realised I STILL had 20 minutes before my (inevitably delayed) train to Derby.
What to do ?
retiredmartin 
How often do you hear the term “wickets” used to describe hand pumps?
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In certain CAMRA magazines that obsess about the number of “wickets” they see on the bar on their pub crawls, even though they often go for a half of the same one and ignore the rest.
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I have a lot to learn about cricket.
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Dave, you need to get Martin to take you to Derbyshire v Yorkshire at Chesterfield if you’re over in the summer. You can watch the cricket and drink Brampton brewery’s beers from their pop-up bar.
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Excellent idea Ian (I guess)
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Next trip is West Midlands/Sheffield and in between. I would love to bowl a few.
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Charlotte, Lilibet and Beatrice (although I always struggle to tell her and Eugenie apart).
Referring to handpumps as wickets is classic Real Ale Twats terminology.
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My thoughts entirely. Actually, it’s real Society of Protection of Beer from the Wood terminology.
I think the chap on the table next to me had “Sporty, Nasty, Posh, Ginger and The Other One” down on his list.
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Wasn’t the terminology used by Rupert Periwinkle, a fictional character who used to appear in “What’s Doing” – The Manchester Beer Drinker’s Monthly Magazine? https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=&ved=2ahUKEwjEza3Y-7-EAxWBVUEAHXQLDzcQFnoECBoQAQ&url=https%3A%2F%2Fgreatermanchester.camra.org.uk%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2FWD253.pdf&usg=AOvVaw0xug3AU2XQnXMstsjI99eP&opi=89978449
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“Wickets” isn’t as bad as “taps” for handpumps.
And aren’t some wicket type handpumps appropriate for a brewer that’s invested in sponsoring cricket since 2008 ?
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My husband always used to use the term “wickets “ in fact I think he still does. Pauline
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Urge him to stop IMMEDIATELY, Pauline.
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“but if ever a town was ill-represented by its GBG entries it’s Uttoxeter”. Given my undrinkable pint in the Night Inn with you last March I couldn’t agree more. It was readily changed when I took it back and that reminds me of a member I know who thinks that if the replacement pint in a pub with ten beers on is at least a 3.5 then it should be in the guide !
“a 21st century Marston Pizza Pub where the only entrance is via the car park” but near me is a 21st century Marston Carvery Pub where there’s also a more direct pedestrian entrance from the A518. I also climbed over the fence.
I’ve remembered that Marstons had one hundred of those “wicket” handpumps to install so they’ve probably not been in more than fifty pubs.
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Just to avoid an unnecessary fight I’m not saying the GBG entries aren’t undeserving, just that you get no sense of Uttoxeter as a pub town from looking at what’s in the Guide.
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Well, the undrinkable pint in the Night Inn with you last March would suggest to me that that venue was undeserving, but I don’t know if it’s in the current book.
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