A PADDINGTON BEAR STARE FOR THE TIRED BEER IN W2

June 2023. London Part 2 of 11.

My heart leaped for joy when I realised I could ride the Central Line from Fairlop straight to Queensway, less than a mile from pub tick No. 2.

My joy was only slightly lessened by the realisation that after 7 years as Mayor Sadiq Khan still hasn’t installed toilets on tubes. Bring back Dick Whittington.

Thank goodness Paddington has loos. And baby change facilities, always useful when you’ve got a leaky cauliflower I would imagine, Si.

Quite a contrast between Barkingside/Ilford/Redbridge and the cosmopolitan area of Paddington between Hyde Park and the Grand Union.

Bayswater seems to be mainly old-fashioned hotels, and the whole area seems left behind by more vibrant neighbourhoods like Stratford, Dulwich and Bexley.

In fact its main purpose seems to be to provide a movie location trail for Japanese tourists who think London is Paddington 2 and Notting Hill.

Still, it’s good to explore a place you don’t know, its streets and unthreatening (bar the beer prices).

What Pub tells me The Cow is “a posh pub”, and as What Pub rarely gives the impression of having ever entered a scuzzy boozer I’m a bit worried about what to expect. Will I need a tie ?

I’m sure I’ve read the Cow is one of the original gastros, and am a bit surprised not to get the “Will Sir be dining with us ?” at the door but make it through to the favoured seat by the oysters, which isn’t something you get to say in a Craft Union pub.

I fairness, there are a few seats at the bar, though the chaps there are awaiting their La Terrine Maison, Home-made Chutney, Toasted Sourdough (13.5).

It’s not a pub for me, or anyone who’s not dining, and I look forward to see if Simon can sneak his mini cheddars and cheese triangles in here.

But it is a gorgeous, convivial, restaurant, and I won’t criticise it.

Clearly it’s the beer quality that gets it in the GBG, right.

Right ?

Landlord or Boltmaker; Landlord is always popular with folka who hate beer, let’s try that.

It’s undrinkable (and £3.35 a half, but that’s a different issue). I politely tell the barman; he gets someone to test it, they agree, and I get the Boltmaker.

“You can finish that one as well” he says, signalling the half of vinegar.

At least the pump is turned round so the next tourist doesn’t get to think all cask ale is like this.

What normally happens at this point is that the replacment is nectar, I give a little cheer and talk about winning the cask beer lottery.

But it really wasn’t, watery and lacking any condition (and I’m not even starting the sparkler debate).

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Published by retiredmartin

Retired NHS, doing long walks around UK and the world to record the great bits. Focused on Good Beer Guide pubs and live music.

22 thoughts on “A PADDINGTON BEAR STARE FOR THE TIRED BEER IN W2”

  1. What on earth?

    “You can finish that one as well”?

    If you complained that the oysters were off would they agree with you and then suggest you eat them anyway? What is wrong with these people?

    There’s a place for pubs like this, but it’s not the Good Beer Guide.

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    1. Good analogy.

      I’m normally a bit reticent about criticising beer quality, but given the pub itself recognised it was off and turned the clip round I reckon it’s fair dos. And when you’re charging £6.70 a pint I reckon it’s your job (not mine) to make sure the beer is OK before you sell it. Frankly, their focus is food and Guinness and they seem to do that very well.

      My last beer round here in Notting Hill had been an equally dreadful pint of Pride.

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      1. It’s much easier returning a pint that’s flat, cloudy, vinegar or smells vile, especially when you’ve been charged top price and it’s a pub you probably won’t go to again, than it is one that’s just a bit tired, has a slightly weird taste, or some other subjective factor that the bar staff can’t detect with their eyes and noses rather than taste buds, or in a pub that normally serves decent beer at reasonable prices and you intend to return to.

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      2. That’s certainly right, Matthew, though in my local (Blind Monkey in Sheffield) I’d always raise the issue at the bar as it’s the sort of pub they wouldn’t take offence.

        I’ve had pints of stout with a sharp tinge of late that I couldn’t be sure was a normal taste or a duff beer; in both cases Mrs RM said “ugh that’s off”. Trust the woman.

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      3. That’s the problem with unknown beers, those you’ve not seen before and won’t see again, you “couldn’t be sure was a normal taste or a duff beer” and they can usually get away with confidently saying “It’s meant to be like that”.
        Stick with Timothy Taylors Landlord, like I did last week in Yotk, and you won’t go far wrong.

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      5. I think we’re at cross purposes.
        I was referring to your “pints of stout with a sharp tinge of late”.

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  3. ““You can finish that one as well” he says” means he doesn’t think there’s anything wrong with it, you’re just being pernickety and the pumpclip was probably showing again two minutes after you left the premises.
    I had a rather different experience eight days ago in Harrogate. A few minutes after we’d sat down our server came across, said “you’re not drinking that” and took our glasses of unintentionally hazy Nicholsons Pale ale from us. I then noticed they had St Austell Anthem on so had that as a replacement but it was worse, not vinegar but way past its best. We were only in there because one of the four of us works for Mitchells and Butlers and though he could get us 30% off our lunches but they weren’t doing food until 4.15pm because they can’t get the staff since Brexit. We were the only customers at about 1pm.
    I did little better in the Wetherspoons and the Blues Bar, the beer only drinking well in the Harrogate Tap.
    Conversely the beer in all but one of my York pubs was drinking very well.

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    1. Harrogate is fascinating, Paul. Five years ago I’d have looked at my spreadsheet of beer scores and told you that Harrogate had half a dozen scoring my highest score on beer quality. Would be different now.

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      1. I wouldn’t have minded getting in the Timothy Taylors pub have no intention of returning to Harrogate.
        York’s very different though.

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  4. Toilets on Elizabeth Line trains, would certainly be a good idea, especially as it takes passengers all the way from Shenfield in the east to Reading in the west. Travelling back from Henley-on-Thames, a couple of months ago, and boarding the EL at Twyford, meant a bladder busting ride all the way back to Farringdon and then London Bridge, especially after a few beers in Henley.

    To make things worse, the facilities at London Bridge are the other side of the ticket barrier now that they’ve done away with those on the platforms.

    Sadiq Khan, certainly needs to get his finger out – metaphorically speaking, of course!

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    1. T’other Paul,
      I agree about toilets on trains which, except for the Underground, have been the norm for nearly a century now, so I’m told.
      I didn’t need one last month though on the Elizabeth Line between the Jamaica Wine House and the Victoria, Streatham Place ( Liverpool Street to Paddington )

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      1. And Sadiq Khan needs to get his finger out with the opening times of those public lavatories that are “Every day” not “Monday to Sunday”.

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      3. I have neither the confidence nor the knowledge of computers to do a blog.
        The Jamaica Wine House was lovely, and convenient for the Bank of England where I had swapped some paper banknotes for the new plastics ones. I was their first customer of the day but they happily took the money for my pint of Master Brew despite not having installed the tills. It’s rare nowadays for bar staff to actually know the price of a pint without looking it up on the electronic till.

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  5. Mrs. E and I had a new one – for us – on not being wanted inside at a pub, at the Brewer’s Arms in Herstmonceux last night. It was Quiz And Pizza night, and not only was every table reserved for a team, but they’d brought extra ones in to fill completely any standing room. So the smoking shelter it was, but it didn’t spoil the HSB a bit.

    Now – and I’ve noticed this before in the rural South – the quizmaster was a real artist who knew how to address a large room with his fine speaking voice and no microphone. So the crowd were spared all the booming, popping, the muffled voice coming from every corner around the pub, which is what you get with a typical pub “PA”, and the quiz “master” staring dolefully down at papers in the shadows.

    It seemed that everyone had a really great night in a packed pub, which is a treat to see.

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    1. Good to hear.

      Pub quizzes seem a sure-fire way of getting a certain demographic back to the pub, and that’s all that matters. Nearly every instance of a packed pub in recent years has been on quiz night. Not sure it would work more than once a week, mind.

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      1. Many years ago I had a team called The Lounge Lizards and, though I say it myself, we we quite successful.
        I still have a few of the prizes including a McEwans Export T shirt, but red isn’t my colour.

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