A great pub runs on Dire Straits and mobility scooters, a great retiredmartin post runs on questionable ’80s pop inserted for the benefit of Mr Crilley.

That’s THIS Monday just gone. I seem to be catching up.

Awoken by joggers (!) at 7, I left Baa Baa Toure to guard the campervan on Teignmouth Prom while I popped back to the Spoons for bacon butty and flat whites.

You’d think that food was standardised across the Spoons estate, but the robust and generous bacon sarnies of Peterlee were here replaced with floury bread and mean streaks.

I headed into Somerset, where I’d just noticed that Chard had an unticked GBG Spoons, one of my few targets certain to be open on a Monday, Monday.

Guide entries in the middle of the page get cruelly overlooked, particularly when they have short names.

A dull trip along the A30 takes you to a dull town that I MUST have been to before but it left no memory. 13,000 souls, most of them noticeably wearing face masks in the fresh air.

Photo : Mike Smith, CC BY-SA 2.0

Some of them were wearing masks INSIDE the Cerdic, too. Well, you can’t be too careful.

The biggest risk is eyestrain from reading the SIX notices,

or a black eye from bumping into perspex.

I do what I’m told and sit at a table closest to the bar; the one where I can see this season’s collection of singlets.

My half of Jail doesn’t turn up, and peering down the bar I can’t see it, so after 10 minutes I wander up to the bar, risking a telling off.

The barmaid is SO lovely she deserves a mention. Let’s call her Eileen.

“Come on, Eileen” I say “Where’s my half”

It’s off so I get a half of Exmoor Beast that I can only risk a sip of as I’m headed south, but it’s a rich foamy marvel (NBSS 3.5+). Should have held on till here for breakfast.

But really, it’s the photos of Boden & Co’s AFC from the Perry Street & District League 1908-09 you come from, isn’t it ?

Right, 5 points. If there’s 5 beers on, how many pints of each does Spoons sell per day ?

In your head.

I finished my hour in the bakery, spending our week’s food allowance on pasties.

7 thoughts on “TWO SPOONS ON MONDAY

  1. 27, which, assuming they get it all in 9s and sales are evenly distributed, is just about enough. There are probably Spoons that do a lot worse. 3 barrels a week is not bad cask turnover nowadays.


  2. Thanks so much for the shout out! I do think New Moon on Monday was evidence of Duran Duran having entered an “every single automatically gets airplay” phase of their popularity. I’m sure they dearly missed that state of affairs a few years later! Still, they got their astonishingly late career hit “Ordinary World,” which, let’s face it, almost no band is allowed to have. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  3. 46,965 pints will have brought no more than £100,000 which is about 5% of average takings of £2,000,000 per venue, about what I might have expected.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s