On to my final taxi duties with the BRAPA Bladder Bender from 3 November (yes, I’m that far behind) and only right I start with the Gents at the White Hart in Great Staughton.
I’ve had the front seat of my Aygo forensically examined and can confirm the great man did make it, just, to the loo here. A conversation with another pub ticking legend about incontinence pants the next week presented some excellent Xmas ideas for Si.
He still stopped to take the traditional photo outside before heading here;
The White Hart has been in the GBG for ages (I was last here a decade ago) and is proof that most CAMRA branches know exactly what they’re doing.
A neat, plain, Batemans local with no craft pretension and plenty of appeal for blokes.
Blokes on spreadsheets, blokes with dogs, blokes settling down for misshaped ball games, blokes tucking into gourmet pub snacks.
“Just get me a beer please” said Si as he made a dash.
So got him a XXXB, which was a bit mean when a man has six pints to put away, but the Bateman flagship is the one to go for.
“Oooh, I’d have gone for the XXXB too” said our hero. I’d had a sip while he was out and I could tell I’d made the right choice. And it looked great.
My lemonade was ill-advised, pairing badly with the complex flavours of the beef & onion cob stuffed with lovely Pipers (where’s that sponsorship lads ?).
Rather disgracefully, Simon ate his own lunch here, hiding his cheesy wotsits behind his secret notebook.
Si kindly let me have a look at his secret notebook, on strict condition I don’t share it with you.
In 100 years time school children will ponder the meaning of “Break til Essex is what I’m saying”.
Now, we were joined by some smiling South Africans, who’d never seen anyone as drunk as Simon before. They were great fun; I hope they won their silly game.
Si just about finished his pint, and I drove him the five minutes to the edge of St Neots, leaving him at the Riverside Park on the banks of the Ouse with three pubs still to do.
And I left him with three instructions;
- Sober up in the Spoons.
- Don’t fall in the Ouse.
- Remember where the door is in the Olde Sun.
He was alright when I left him.
retiredmartin 
Midget dogs in Scotland but proper sized dogs in that pub.
And a proper cheese and onion cob improperly wrapped in clingfilm.
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Actually beef and onion, but the clingfilm is, indeed, the mark of a true cob/bap/butty etc.
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Proper sized dogs in Scotland, very large bottle.
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Nice to see some punters under 50 !
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Simon is 19.
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It’s just cruel to give him an IQ test in that condition.
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He needs to be nicer to March.
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The town I guess. He didn’t like it, did he ? Had a great time at 3 GBG pubs 2 years ago. It may just be the best Fenland town if you’re determined to go back.
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I love it written as a note to himself. Great stuff.
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Oh, I hadn’t noticed him dissing March till you mention it ! Brilliant.
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“He was alright when I left him.”
Similar to the saying in Belfast regarding the Titanic – “It was fine when it left here…”
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Or “it was in tune when I bought it”.
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Dan,
Yes, and they wouldn’t have hung the Bass mirrors in the ship’s bar if they could have predicted the icebergs !
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Murky craft DIPA goes down the shitter, of course.
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“What about murky DIPA ?”
And stout/porter? Or does that come out the back due to its colour?
“and can confirm the great man did make it, just, to the loo here.”
As we say over here… that “depends”.
(ah, I see you mention that in the next sentence) 🙂
“Hello”
Also (I’m guessing) not a bloke. 😉
“Proper cobs”
As opposed to what was lurking at the bottom of Si’s rucksack?
“but the Bateman flagship is the one to go for.”
I have a soft spot for Bateman’s (never had it) after seeing it in Michael Jackson’s Beer Hunter series.
“Rather disgracefully, Simon ate his own lunch here,”
Aha!
“on strict condition I don’t share it with you.”
From the looks of it, he usually doesn’t start taking notes until after at least five pints. 😉
“we were joined by some smiling South Africans, who’d never seen anyone as drunk as Simon before.”
Wait, whut? South Africans not familiar with drunk people. Surely you jest!
“He was alright when I left him.”
Said many a person to the local law over the years. 🙂
Cheers!
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A terrific post for lemonade and beef and onion cobs!!! Top work
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