By Saturday lunchtime I’d realised the postman wasn’t bringing my new Beer Guide, and as I’ve mentioned my nearest GBG18 tick was by now 210 minutes away in Wales.
Sure, I could have finished Boak & Bailey’s 20th Century Pub, but I’d only been reading it for a year and you can’t rush a classic.
So I went to the football. Proper football, not that namby-pamby skilful, tiki-taka, entertaining stuff you get at the Etihad, but proper grass-roots kick’n’rush.
Simon will have to make the walk through Ely past the sports and leisure complex if he saves the £20 taxi to the Plough in Little Downham. Presuming that isn’t kicked out of the Guide for upsetting Si by being shut on his last visit.
In one big blob (B above) you get the rugby, football and golf clubs, a multiplex cinema, and all those chain fast food places you get from Camberley to Carlisle. Truly, Ely is the new Haverhill.
And now, a brand new pub I didn’t know about.
OK, a Greene King diner, but they’re always reliable, aren’t they ?
But that was for later, I’ve only got ten minutes to kick-off and I don’t want to miss a Burning Sky saison on the club bar.
A nice welcome from the gnomes, £6 to get in, the price of a pie at City.
Sadly, the club bar extends only to IPA Smooth, East Coast, Stella and Carling (the guest beer, no doubt).
As Pubmeister noted, a classic stand giving a decent view.
And the free drama of a seat that fell off its hinges as soon as I sat down.
My last foray into grass roots football at Soham lasted 16 seconds, so I got better value here from a higher quality match than I’d expected, even on a heavy pitch.
Confusingly, there was no big screen replay of the lone Ely goal on 14 minutes, no “Thank you Sheikh” banner, no tattoos of guns or potatoes, and poor quality simulation.
Instead, two old ladies gave me a commentary on the game, consisting of “Get up” and “You lucky bugger“, which is all you need, really.
This time I caught the second half penalty save that kept Gorleston at bay.
The 5 away fans in the Green Army looked bereft, but at least they have some of Norfolk’s better pubs to return home to.
There wasn’t even a board to signify the added minutes, let alone a VAR screen, so the final whistle came as a shock and I sprinted out of the gate to beat the other 99 spectators to the nearest pub. I needn’t have bothered.
Now, I know you’d want a burger or a big burger before watching “Mama Mia 2“, but would you want two pints of Abbot or Black Sheep ? Not with my bladder, you wouldn’t.
My usual question got the usual response;
“Which one’s going quickest mate ?”
“Sorry mate, only got back today” I meant today, not ever.
The barman was really cheerful and helpful, and said they’d all been pulled through, in that “We’re proud of our ales” way.
I picked the Otter out of loyalty. It wasn’t just undrinkable, it would have made you retch. Our barman was apologetic and suggested the London Glory, implying more than one might have been sold of that one today.
I took it to the corner, with a good view of Carragher whining about something or other; perhaps the London Glory which was frankly little better (NBSS 1). I didn’t bother looking for a potted plant.
It gives me no joy to write that. Or tell you you’re better off with Punk IPA or the cans of Gamma Ray they had behind the bar.
But it’s true..
And no. They didn’t turn the Otter clip round.
retiredmartin 
Who does end up drinking it? I would think most who order it would know better than to drink it. I always wonder what they gain from not turning the pump clip?
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I guess, how would you know it was off ? I didn’t.
I wouldn’t normally buy a beer with a paper pump clip, of course, but I’m sure someone in the next two days would have ordered the Otter (or the London Glory). Is it possible that someone would suffer it ?
The pub can’t gain anything. Cask is just an irritant, albeit people expect to see handpumps in a pub, as opposed to a restaurant.
And it had all been going so well…
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Why would any owner persist in selling it? They wouldn’t sell spoiled food. They have the next cask to put on spoiling right behind it. It just seems so counter productive to leave it on. Really weird to me.
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I can only assume they have no idea how long beer should keep, and just follow Head Office orders to replace it at the end of the barrel. I have heard some landlords say beer can last a week, which is a week less four hours than I’d prefer it.
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We’ll figure it out after we figure out the numbering scheme on the seats in the stadium.
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I missed that. I think it’s something to do with the Wicker Man.
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Strange this beer quality lark. I was at Matlock FC on Tuesday night and they had Doom Bar and Exmoor Silver Stallion both in good condition. I guess they may have put them on for the night but unlikely given that they were away today. With hours that might shame a micro that seems like good work on the beer front.
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Step outside the door now, Ian, and remind yourself where you’re living.
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There’s nowt wrong with kick and rush.
Life after Football built an entire career on that.
Kick and rush is the lifeblood that courses through Midland’s football.
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LAF’s kicks were fairly accurate though.
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Terrific!! Love a non league football post with shit beer to boot!! Keg is way forward for football clubs
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“They’re probably holding that cup Hull nearly won once”
The Robins? At least another 20 clubs have that as a nickname.
“Stella men”
Certainly not stellar. 😉
“I didn’t break it, honest”
And their seat numbering system is a bit wonky as well.
” I didn’t bother looking for a potted plant.”
Ugh.
“But it’s true..”
Indeed.
“And no. They didn’t turn the Otter clip round.”
Crikey!
Cheers
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Definitely a ‘to boldly go…’ post RM. Clearly all CAMRAs fault for not delivering your GBG 19.
Though I get the impression you could learn to love keg beer and pubs outside the GBG..;)
Liked the gnomes though – they were nice….:)
On the bright side at least you saved money and got two rubbish beers for the price of one…
It amazes me that though cask beer is a ‘foodstuff’ sold to consumers, it seems to have very little food standards quality control at the retail stage. I truly believe there will increasingly become a clear distinction between real ale specialist pubs and other pubs. The continued rise of micropubs will probably help to swell the numbers of specialist cask ale pubs – provided they don’t go completely craft keg – keep the GBG nice and heavy.
It already seems that more and more ordinary pubs are loosing interest and not stocking cask ale. Even where they are selling it and it is often in poor condition – that can’t be sustainable.
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I do love keg beer, Pub Hermit. But cask can be great (as it was on my Southampton trip). Losing interest in cask is spot on, but then they stock loads of it anyway. Cask volumes plummeting through Summer, just as they did in 2017.
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GBG should be out on 13th September. Did I mention I’ve already seen which pubs are in it ages ago ..?
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A bit confusing reading about a game played two Saturdays ago. At first I thought I had spotted a date misprint on the front of the Ely City programme. Was your comment about Good Beer Guide 2019 not arriving from August 25th or September 8th?
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Being only two weeks behind is the best I’ve been in a year, mate. I was hoping for it on the 25th, which is when it came, give or take, last year.
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