No, nothing to do with B****t. A post with no pub visit in it brought to you in the interest of historical completeness as Mrs RM gamely sought to provide us with fish and chips on the Northumberland coast*.


In Alnmouth we found the glories of the eponymous bay, and some pretty houses, but no chippy. How do people even live ?

Best beaches in England ?
Nice, but not a chippy

In east Derbyshire you’re never more than 20 metres from fish and chips, apparently. It’s easy to forget how tiny the villages up here past the Wall. Even touristy Alnwick frustrates with its meagre opening hours.

Still, you come for the sunsets , not the shops. And a solitude helped by making you park half a mile up the hill to keep the 305 residents sane.

Craster approach


Yes, there’s a pub.

Jolly Fisherman

And if Mrs RM had been driving I’d popped in for a pre-emptive tick of Workie Ticket.

But we’d come for fish. And settled for kippers.


Follow the smoke to the Craster Seafood Restaurant, owned by the smokers themselves.


I was grumpy at not getting to eat chip on the beach, but the kippers and fish stew were gorgeous. Mrs RM mixed her murk with wine, always a bad move.

The banter quotient was low, I suspect the Jolly Fisherman would have had more condiment drama at very least.


I’ll do a comparison with the smokies in Arbroath if you’re good.

*Free marriage guidance – never argue about fish and chips.

28 thoughts on “KIPPERED IN CRASTER

  1. Far better fish and chips is to be had a few hundred yards inland at the food-led but still very pubby Cottage Inn, where the locals drink. The beer’s better than the very gastro Jolly Fisherman as well IMHO.

    Liked by 1 person

      1. I certainly do! Next time you’re up the Harbour Chippy at Seaton Sluice is outstanding these days – best for miles.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Whoa, whoa, your like that ex-footballer bloke with his Lazarus. Quality not quantity. East Derbyshire is not comparable to the wonderful place about which you speak. I could say it’s a shit hole but there’s a lot of people live in middle England, but where do they go on holiday. And oh boy, do they like their holidays. I guess you can see why. There are some very good chippies in Nortumberland (probably none south of Sheffield) just go to Seahouses a few miles up the road, or even Beadnell. And why no descriptive of the Jolly Fisherman? OK it’s not what it used to be, but it’s alright. I’m not liking your take on N.Northumberland when you wax lyrical about shit holes on the Midlands with even shitter beer. Sorry mate.


  3. “It’s easy to forget how tiny the villages up here past the Wall.”

    Aha! You DO watch Game of Thrones. (LOL)

    “*Free marriage guidance – never argue about fish and chips.”

    I’m married to a cook. I never argue about anything on the menu. 🙂

    “And if Mrs RM had been driving I’d popped in for a pre-emptive tick of Workie Ticket.”

    Ahh. A bit like the advice given just above; never argue about the possibility of a pre-emptive. 😉


    Liked by 1 person

    1. Surely Game of Thrones is GOT rather than LOL. I’ve never seen it, Russ. Should I ? I’ve never seen any Star Wars, Star Trek or Marvel films either, though was Marvel-obsessed as a boy.


      1. Hmmm.

        GOT is good but better to binge watch, and maybe wait till the final season is over… NEXT YEAR (sheesh).

        Star Wars… first three (or episodes 4-6) 🙂

        Star Trek… even numbered films.

        Marvel Movies; I’ve enjoyed most those I’ve seen. Better than the DC comics movies (apart from the Dark Knight series).


        Liked by 1 person

      2. “Might do whole in one go, as with Wire and Breaking Bad.”

        Yup, saw Breaking Bad that way. Haven’t seen the Wire yet but heard it’s pretty good. Must make a note.

        Liked by 1 person

  4. Had a week in a cottage next door to the pub in Craster & it was memorable because it was the first pub our lad had been allowed inside -he was about 2 & it was a quiet weekday early evening (pre all day opening ) so we bravely went in.He was entertained by looking at the fruit machine (a taste of things to come) we kept him returning to the table buy tempting him with crisps.It was quite exciting at the time -we didn’t get out much in those days

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Taking your children in a pub for the first time is one of the best things about having children. Our first son racked up 120 in his first year and still hasn’t had a beer at 19.


  5. Wish mine was so abstemious -he’s a bit of a beer monster & currently at the beer festival at Halfway House Brenchley -he allowed us to join the gang one year but no further invitations have been forthcoming.Perhaps we behaved badly.

    Liked by 1 person

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