retiredmartin

March 2026. Wuppertal. Germany.

And as you’ll know I have a very precise definition of my “top 100s“. But certainly this suspended monorail in the industrial Ruhr would be in there.

Wuppertal, then, “founded in 1929 by the merger of Elberfeld, Barmen, Ronsdorf, Cronenberg and Vohwinkel“, Wupper being the river, and the bear, that binds them together. Wuppertal is a difficult place to pin down. A bit like the Potteries, Mrs RM just agreed, with Hanley the cultural lead mirroring Elberfield.

One tiny issue. How exactly do you get on the monorail.

We couldn’t find the entrance. So we asked the friendly, almost English-speaking tourist officer who two minutes earlier had given us the little guide to the Schwebebahn.

“Oh, it is closed due to a strike today“. NOW you tell me.

It felt a bit like going to Hanley and finding the Coachmakers Arms out of Bass, or visting Maidenhead and not getting abuse in the multi-storey car park.

Mrs RM, who had insisted we needed 3 days to cover the city, was unbowed. “We’ll tick the elephants instead !“

Well, where to start. She had a map.

I know it says Wuppertal at the top, and Luisenviertel at the bottom, but it is Elberfeld .

And it’s a gem, from the modernist city church,

to the mysterious clock that, like the one in Piercebridge, had stopped dead,

to a sign that may be traced back to 1876,

and a surprisingly attractive, if slightly worn, city hall.

“And this is the worst city in Germany ?” we thought, adding Gelsenkirchen and Mönchengladbach to our To Do lists.

I mean, apart from the Von der Heydt art gallery and that monorail and cheap schnitzel there might not be an awful lot to do,

but often just aimless strolling is enough.

Great street art on every corner,

and a skate park that looked terrifying on approach,

but those steps lead to some of the most attractive town houses, and a view of the Hip Hop mural.

Almost as impressive were the spiritual messages on the side of St Lawrence. Mrs RM knows this one by rote.

An hour of walking, time for a beer, surely ?