retiredmartin

Well, you made it to 2024. Now, and only now, can we look back and do a highlights issue.

It’s a two-parter, splitting life from pubs and beer so folk like me with the attention span of a gnat can get to the end.

You’ll know I’m not one to look back, but this Annual Highlights issue is a contractual obligation, and a reminder to my Patronised reader that they can view the limited edition “scratch and sniff” version of this post by saying the magic words;

2023 was a difficult year with all four parents and PILs suffering the trials and tribulations of old age. One day I’ll be middle-aged and I’m dreading it. “Old age isn’t for the faint-hearted” said the fella next to Dad on EAU 5 (not a beer score)

The staff in the emergency and elderly wards at Addenbrookes confirmed my ongoing faith in humanity,

and they’re my heroes of the year, and not in an M People way.

Personally I’ve been felt as fit as ever, speeding past youngsters along the Rochdale Canal towpath from Piccadilly to the Etihad on the way to watch the best footballer I’ve ever seen.

Yep, the Stockport maestro. All the best things come from Stocky. Phil Foden is my Man of the Year (which means he’ll be brutally crocked in his next game, obviously).

Good job I can walk so fast or I’d have missed the last train from Manchester back to Sheffield a dozen times, and while I’m at it the rail services have been terrible this year, crushed like sardines on every journey. The rail companies are my Villains of the Year.

Which is a shame, as I’ve used rail a lot this year, as relentlessly slogging up and down the A1 to see parents has taken its toll on my desire to drive much at all after taking the campervan round the UK to complete the Guide last year.

I wondered if I’d get a bit bored of this blog after finishing the GBG, but it started as a travel diary and I still love the writing, and your comments, and the views from (nearly) all over the globe. 813 posts this year, scarily that’s 3 less than 2022.

I had a view from the Northern Mariana Islands this year, so declare them my Country of the Year, and look forward to presenting them with their bottle of Doom Bar at the Godfather’s Bar,

as soon as they fund my travel arrangements.

The blog always seemed less popular whenever I wrote about exciting foreign travel, but picked up markedly as soon as I stayed closer to home, and December was my best ever month for views.

This post from a Greene King family diner on the edge of Sleaford was my most read new post,

and a (never-ending) series of posts about the Parliamentary train to Brigg were incredibly popular with the Parliamentary train to Brigg fans.

It’s all about the mobility scooters outside a pub isn’t it ? Brigg was my UK town of 2023. Or was it Wem ?

Mrs RM has a lovely wooden map on the dining room wall (top) and has grand ambitions to visit ALL the world’s countries, but more immediately we made four flights to the Balkans and Baltics in order to a) hasten global warming, b) pump money into Luton’s economy now Will no longer goes there since the Hatters reached the evil Prem, and c) close in on completing all of Europe.

Amongst many highlights were the Scottish quarter of Tallinn,

the monasteries of Meteora,

and the Georgian dumpling of Kaunas, which was my Foreign Town of the Year.

But were those dumplings better than the Chinese takeaway in South Cave on my birthday (22/12) ?

Not a chance.

And finally, before the pubs, I get to tell you which American females you should be listening to instead of Blur and Slowdive.

Record of the Year (2022 – Lizzie McAlpine) Rett Madison – One for Jackie, a record about her mother’s suicide that had me in bits, particularly 2 minutes into Skydiving.

Runners-up, Haley Blais – Wisecrack,

Harp – Albion. The inclusion of a bloke on my top albums list is subject to an internal investigation.

Folk who miss the Cocteau Twins will love Harp.

Gracie Abrams – Good Riddance

Jess Williamson – Time Ain’t Accidental

Stay tuned for pubs and beers and pointless stats.