HOOK, LINE AND CITRA

The Pub Bloggers Code states “Thou Shalt Not Visit A Fellow Blogger’s Home Town Without Buying Him A Doom Bar“. That rule was subsequently and contentiously amended to exclude Tonbridge.

Arguably Heathrow Terminal 5 is the home of the Southworth clan, and if they’d really wanted to be in the UK we’d have met them at the groundside Spoons.

But Hook looked easier, we passed J5 of the M3 as he got home from work (whatever that is) and I was jealous as Simon had just met him, accidentally, in Croydon.

I feared Citra would make us go to one of Hook’s many craft beer bars, but instead it was a rambling old trad pub I vaguely remembered from the noughties when the A30 briefly became a GBG hotspot.

I’d forgotten the “Not the Old” bit within 2 minutes, of course.

I guessed right, anyway.

At least it had Proper Pub windows, but would it deliver the BBB that young Mick loves?

We were escorted to our table away from the bar, but I was graciously allowed to go and buy beer and those Max crinkly crisps while Mrs RM interrogated Citra about her aunt, who lives down the road.

Oh, yes.

Far too much choice.

Citra went all awkward on me and refused to pose with his pint of Doom, fearing ostracisation from Hampshire Untppd or whatever. Apart from that he was perfect company.

So Mrs RM had to drink most of my pint as well as the TEA. Both average, since you insist.

Not much ale drinking in evidence anywhere in a pub only half full despite the lure of West Ham v Newcastle on the big screen.

Citra, you’ll remember, kindly met me for a pint up the road in March, allowing me an early escape from a family birthday celebration that would nowadays result in instant arrest by Covid Marshalls.

On the way out Citra led us through the maze of one way signs and Handwash, and I STILL ended up getting told off. But at least it wasn’t by Mrs RM this time.

Published by retiredmartin

Retired NHS, doing long walks around UK and the world to record the great bits. Focused on Good Beer Guide pubs and live music.

19 thoughts on “HOOK, LINE AND CITRA”

  1. Hogs Back TEA, marginally cooler than Doom Bar, but not a lot. I had technically not been back from work, but that did involve an hour in a different pub with more interesting beer. Always good to meet up.

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  3. “Thou Shalt Not Visit A Fellow Blogger’s Home Town Without Buying Him A Doom Bar“. That rule was subsequently and contentiously amended to exclude Tonbridge.

    Thank-you Martin, and much appreciated. I shall await your next visit safe in the knowledge that you won’t attempt to foist a pint of Doom (Bar) on me!

    Have done several train journeys, including two that were an hour or so in duration. Masked up, as required, but with no-one sitting anywhere near me, was it really necessary?

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  4. Next time we are at Heathrow we will remember to call for a ride.

    Nice to know there are others who interrogate.

    What I would do for a pint of Doom right now… And it is only 8 AM.

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  6. “That rule was subsequently and contentiously amended to exclude Tonbridge.”

    Blimey. That ‘other’ Paul will be most upset.

    “Arguably Heathrow Terminal 5 is the home of the Southworth clan,”

    (slow golf clap)

    “I guessed right, anyway.”

    You have that way with you, sir.

    “Citra went all awkward on me and refused to pose with his pint of Doom,”

    Carry a carboard cutout with you. He falls for that every time. 😉

    “But at least it wasn’t by Mrs RM this time.”

    Guffaw!

    Cheers

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    1. You all have to snap out of this Doom Bar malaise, I’m currently in a wonderful rustic micropub in Hastings drinking an equally wonderful Marble Lagonda IPA, this is pubbing. Gooseberry and Elderflower sour up next. 🤔

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