retiredmartin

Golf is back.

For some people this is more important than the reopening of pubs, or the Chinese takeaway, or the opportunity to meet your mother-in-law (at a distance) in Tunbridge Wells.

If you thought Kentish micropubs loved rules, you should see the regulations that greet gentlefolk returning to Girton Golf Club this week.

Only two players per group, no petting, no taking the ball out of the hole, no loos, no bar at the 19th hole, no buggies. NO BUGGIES !!

Dad is enjoying his little trips out in the car, but I’m under orders to make sure he doesn’t wander on to the new A14 that crosses Girton.

If you ignore the hills, and Germans driving on the wrong side of the road, you could be looking at a famous album cover;

90 minutes for a round, plenty of time to show you all of Girton’s treasures.

Two pubs side-by-side, neither of which have troubled the GBG.

Toad in the Hole for £14.90 at the thatched Old Crown,

or Phad Thai at the simpler George.

“Cask ale accounts for much of the beer sold. Sadly the guest beer choice is no longer as exciting as the display of past pump clips show it once was.” bemoans WhatPub, which tells you quite a lot about CAMRA preferences.

Best pub here is the Social Club, says Mark.

Not much about Girton is exciting, apart from house prices.

The Little Free Library is bereft of GBGs but does have “Keep Smiling Through“.

The approach to a tame Cambridgeshire village is a series of 24 speed taming bumps, so you’ll want to head to the country lanes and pretend there’s not a 3 lane carriageway 200 metres away.

By law you have to be called either “Tom” or “Joan” to live here.

Joan, 82, approaches me down the lane and I step into the hedge to meet my SD,

“If men had hid in bushes waiting for me 60 years ago I’d have hit them with my stick” she laughs.

The cutting-edge, award-winning playground isn’t roped off, but I resist.

Girton College, where Joan studied History of Lute in 1956-59, is closed. Shame, we used to hold NHS events there and the grounds are gorgeous.

Opposite the College you’ll see what sort of employment Girton offers.

Street art ? you ask.

That’s your lot, bar the church and a Co-op. We now have one Co-op per 77 residents in South Cambs.

Dad lost his 9 holes, by the way. But the other chap IS a mere 72.