COTTINGHAM WANTS ME FOR A SUNBEAM

3rd January 2020

Last stop before the train returns to civilisation is Cottingham, providing a first new GBG entry in what seems like a century but is probably two years.

Cottingham

Cottingham, not to be confused with the village next to me where I lerned to rite, can best be summed up in two words.

David Davis.

I’ll spare you a pic of the MP for Haltemprice, which isn’t a real place. Instead here’s a phone box.

Wiki says Cottingham (pop. 17k) is of “average affluence“, by which they mean relative to the UK rather than east Hull, I guess.

I remember some smartish but dull GBG pubs. Actually, I don’t remember them at all, but the Hallgate Tavern may live longer in the memory.

From the outside, traditional town pub.

Two steps in, vast echoing sports bar with two unused handpumps.

Two unused handpumps?

They’re taking my mantra about Quantity v Quality too far.

But keep walking.

Past the second pool table and wall mounted TVs.

Past the children drinking pop (not a euphemism) on high stools.

And you come to a lounge with slogans written on 17th century beams.

And the main bar.

It’s worth the 20 minute walk from the front door.

“Thanks bud”

Yes, a basic Marston pub in an affluent Yorkshire village. Love you lots, GBG.

The sign at the door said £2.50 a pint but that must be Thursday at 10am.

Still, this was a bargain Banks’s.

And a cool, foamy 3.5, with a choice of Uzbekistan tennis or Latvian cricket on 22 screens to enjoy while overhearing unrepeatable conversations about “Insufficient funds”.

Lacings

I’d guess 30 in on a Friday afternoon, which is decent.

Today’s 5 points goes to whoever can make sense of the loo art. (Gents, for a change).

Sadly Cottingham lacks much of beauty, which is something you can never say about Hull.

23 thoughts on “COTTINGHAM WANTS ME FOR A SUNBEAM

  1. I remember the Tiger in Cottingham, but that was when I was working at the Hull Brewery so when David Davis was Chairman of the Federation of Conservative Students.

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  2. I had quite a few visits to Cottingham back in the 70’s when I was “walking out ” with a lad who was studying at the Uni & for some reason the halls were in Cottingham -at the time I thought it was a quite nice village & I think I remember The Tiger too.We often went to Beverley on the train -very handy !

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      1. Beverley is a lovely place -very popular with the students at the time -I suppose it still is if Halls of residence are still in Cottingham

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      2. Pauline,
        Yes, Beverley is a lovely place boasting not only the White Horse, arguably the jewel in Humphrey’s crown, but also a very fine Minster.

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      3. It took me a little while to work out the the White Horse is Nelly’s. Without the hint that it is owned by dear Humpy, I don’t think I would have got it.

        I am going to guess that the Fat Spaniels are some form of modern death music ensemble. Dogs like bones, hence the skull and cross bones. Either most cunning or complete bollocks. Therefore, 5 points please.

        One day I will perform due diligence.

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      4. Tom,
        Yes, and I’m old enough to remember good old Nellie Collinson back in the 1970s.
        I ‘m not sure she would have allowed mobile ‘phones if they’d been invesnted.

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      5. Not yet, I’m not. However, I have ambition to become one.

        If anybody would like to employ a geographically mobile inexperienced Hull City supporter who has passed the Level 3 AAT qualification with distinction, please let me know.

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      1. I can’t remember exactly where and when but I was last “walking out” with Mrs TSM when the pub wasn’t doing the meals she expected.

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