A night out in Middlesbrough. You Southerners (south of Stoke) don’t know what you’re missing.
Great architecture,
overlooked Art Deco masterpieces,
and inflatable sheep.
No new Guide pubs in ‘Boro for a while, the micro boom of 2014-16 has subsided.
BUT your CAMRA membership not only allows you to enter pointless arguments about broccoli on Discourse.
Oh no, you’ll shortly be getting Spoons-like discount in Stonegate pubs, too.
Like the Discovery, named after the discovery of the Parmo in 1978.
Central ‘Boro is a bit quiet, I presume folk head to Stockton for Bass or sit in their rooms in their underpants looking for errors on my blog on a Friday night.
Enough (drunken) life here for me in this ex-Yates, as well as cheap beer, of course.
Here you get good cask for Ā£2.10 pre voucher (Double Maxim, 3.5), the worst karaoke version of “When Will I See You Again” since U2 at Slane Castle,
and of course the crucial Faroes v Spain U-21 tie on 17 screens.
Oh, and something for the speedway fan.
The karaoke improved with the theme from the Lion King, but even my hardened sensibilities weren’t prepared for a 29 year old mum from Billingham doing “I Touch Myself” with the actions.
Time for a Spoons.
Now I know some people accuse the BBC of being a bit left wing at times, but that seems just too close a relationship for comfort.
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I only just noticed that!
BBC in cahoots with the Gross Incompetence Party, that’s all.
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But which Gross Incompetence Party? Although I suspect after a decent session most of them would default to the Gross Incontinence Party.
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That’s copywrited by our Beer and Pubs Forum.
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I thought most members of that were well into the colostomy bag stage.
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“good cask for Ā£2.10 pre voucher” – and they probably do a “Buy six pints, get the seventh free” card but you keep moving on too quickly for one of those.
And they probably do a better breakfast than Tim, one with plenty of sausages.
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Yes they probably do, Paul. Some ladies were on their seventh pint, but it wasn’t cask.
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Prosecco??
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But the Seventh Free Collectors Card from my nearest Stonegate pub is only for Cask Ale.
Or maybe they do a different one “for the ladies”.
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SPOONS CASK WOE GOES ON AND ON
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Only available to Premium readers.
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Folks pay you to read this ?
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I pay folks to read this garbage. All in the T & Cs. More if you wear a MAGA hat while reading it.
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> More if you wear a MAGA hat while reading it.
Just a MAGA hat ? And nothing else ?
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Of course. Have you seen the underpants?
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“Have you seen the underpants?”
I have a pair of those for Friday night blog corrections.
Of course mine stand for Make All Grammatically Accurate. š
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Sold at Primark ?
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> or sit in their rooms in their underpants looking for errors on my blog on a Friday night.
I do that but do not have any connections with Middlesbrough.
Incidentally, you have a spelling mistake on the first line :-
> A night out in Middlesborough.
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Only one. Keep up.
American spelling rules apply at the moment i.e.anything goes.
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“and inflatable sheep.”
And apparently they’re fun too!
“or sit in their rooms in their underpants looking for errors on my blog on a Friday night.”
I resemble that remark!
“the worst karaoke version of āWhen Will I See You Againā since U2 at Slane Castle,”
Bloody hell.
“for a 29 year old mum from Billingham doing āI Touch Myselfā with the actions.”
That inflatable sheep is looking better and better.
“Time for a Spoons.”
Meaning a karaoke of one of their songs? š
(may I suggest Romantic Traffic)
Cheers
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Inflatable sheep get a bad press.
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Did France win…once went to scariest chip shop in Britain on a back street of Middlesbrough
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Was that after a match at Ayresome Park or before?!
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After a game – when I was a journo. Me and a snapper fancied some post match chips and found an estate that looked like nothing I’ve seen before…apart from Willenhall in Coventry!
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Great comparison.
I wouldn’t go for the chips, but the parmo (cheese and ham in a pizza, oversimplifying) is actually wonderful.
You’d really love the Sun in Stockton if you can persuade the family up there for a holiday š
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I’ll work on it…Mrs BB has some good friends in Whitey Bay so I reckon I can stretch it as far as there….
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Stockton on the way up just off the A19. Whitley Bay is one of my favourite seaside places, particularly just up coast at charmingly named Seaton Sluice
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They know how to sell themselves these northern seaside towns š
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